historical fun fact: today marks the 70th anniversary to the start of world war two.
time and history are funny little subjects; or, rather they are confusing, horrible and nice to compartmentalize at a moment's notice. yesterday i spent the day with my best friend in high school, subsequently still one of the greatest friends i have had, and afterward i thought long and hard about time and the history we create. history doesn't have to be as snazzy as revolution, war, political turmoil or social upheavals--the kinds that make me love my studies--but it can be how we get from one place to now and how time, with its many quirks, works for or against how our history will unfold. i spent the better part at fifteen, when this friend and i truly entered each other's lives, being angry and american eagle wearable and morphed into the most contrived sixteen year old ever. during this time my friend wasn't even really my close friend until summer two-thousand and five after we ate greasy onion rings at a restaurant that presently does not exist, did projects together on caribbean religions and laughed at lunchtime sexcapades in biology class. had the thing that brought us together not happened, i shudder to think where we would be in life. would our paths still ultimately meet and would we bond over the same songs, same teenage heartaches?
this can be said with any person that walks into your life. if another person had not been involved with one of my other greatest friend's, we would never have met. my doppelganger would still be walking around and i would still be the missing polish child in her mother's life. i like to think that since i was too good for him, though slightly wounded by rejection, that she was too good for him because we were pretty much the same in the field of awesome, something he just couldn't handle.
boys seem to be the linkage here to true, great friendships. maybe my data is skewed and biased.
i was reading old journals awhile ago and i cringed at the things i saw while i scanned the pages. i didn't even have to read them. i skimmed and i cringed. i don't want to be nostalgic anymore in the sense that "oh, those good old days." what good old days are we talking about? i am turning twenty-one in a few months. my days are incomparable to anyone my senior, even by two, three, four, five years. being sixteen wasn't so great. even being seventeen wasn't that great! why be nostalgic when everything is in front of me? i feel so flippant about life lately. i am and i am not in certain respects. grad school, i am not flippant about but everything else? flippant.
