is this how christmas is supposed to be? screaming matches about how we're both terrible people and continuing this vicious cycle of being awful to each other? you are her. you turned into her and denial is not becoming of you. i don't want it to be the situation where i move so far away because i know you won't visit me and then we are just done in each others lives. i want you to be there for me and to care and not force me into this role of being just like you while you play her because you can't get out of this cycle.

i just want it to stop.